September 25, 2013

Human Shaming: Rita's Revenge

Rita here! I want to start by thanking Kol’s Notes or My Brown Newfies for giving me a chance to turn the tables on my Momma. She embarrasses me all the time online, so it's good to get a chance for payback. You know what they say about Payback - she's a bitch, just like me! (Payback is a weird name for a girl dog...)
Just the other day my Momma was embarrassing me, commenting on someone else's blog about how shy I am when I poop! Well, if I'm shy about pooping in public, doesn't it occur to her that I might be shy about her talking about it too! Geesh!

Since she embarrasses me all the time, here goes with 2 things she does! (Or doesn't do!) First of all, do you remember when she posted on Monday Mischief about how I'm supposed to eat these cat cookies in the mornings when we wake up late (cuz otherwise I get the head-bobbles).
She used to buy the sugar cookie kind, and she didn't really like them, so other than having to eat 1 or 2 to show me that they are okay to eat (she explained that on her other post), she would stay out of them. But then last time she got the ginger snap kind... and now she eats like 2 or 3 for every one I eat!
Those are my cookies, Momma! So I don't get the head-bobbles!
Not cool, Momma. Not cool. Grrrrr.... (look how mad I am in that picture!)*

Speaking of cookies, here's something she doesn't do... She won a special doggie cookbook AGES ago. Can you guess how many times she has made me treats using the book?

Yeah, that's right. Never. She has NEVER made one of the recipes in the Dog Cookies book for me!

I just thought of another thing she did! Our friend Sugar had a blog hop called Scoop That Poop: Be a Scooper Hero on Monday, and Momma should have joined cuz it's important to remind people to pick up! She should have shared this cool info that Sugar put together:
Click to "big-ify" it!

But no... she didn't cuz she normally does her Monday blogs on Sunday afternoon, but Sunday afternoon/night they left me here all alone (!) and went to a concert! They tried to say it was nothing to do with dogs and it would be loud and I wouldn't like it, but then I found these pictures on Daddy's phone:

What the heck? They must have gone to some kind of amazing doggy show** without me! So, not only did I get left home alone for hours, I missed out on some doggy fun, and Momma couldn't get her "poop" together in time to get a blog post done! Geez.

I think we should have Human-shaming once a week, not just once a year! Thanks again to Kol’s Notes or My Brown Newfies for letting me get all that off my chest! 

* Jackie here... She's not actually mad or growling in that pic. She's chewing the cookie I just gave her...

** Me again. No, we weren't at a doggy show. We went to a rock concert - Depeche Mode to be precise. We've seen them many times, and they always have cool - and sometimes bizarre - videos in the background. Well, during the song "Precious" (which is actually about the songwriter's kids when he was going through a divorce - not about dogs - and is a beautiful song) they showed all these images of the CUTEST dogs! The hubs was snapping pics like crazy. These 2 came out the best. The one looks like Dakota from Dakota's Den! So fun! So... precious!!

24 comments:

  1. Lol! This is so great! There's so much I love about this post!
    Your Mom eats your cookies, she has a cook book to make you treats but hasn't....yet and she went to a Depeche Mode concert! You are so lucky to have such a cool mom Rita!

    ReplyDelete
  2. OMG this cracked me up. I love the last one "I can't even look at you." Perfect!

    ReplyDelete
  3. You should be asjamed, eating Rita's cookies...and the concert without her )that really does look like Dakota - I thought you had photoshopped!)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mama, you really need to get some Jones taffy or jerky for poor Rita. It will keep her head from bobbling and keep you from eating her treats. Better yet, some lamb lung puffs or Windee rings. OM NOM NOM

    ReplyDelete
  5. Poor Rita. You really should call the SPCA and report these indignities. Although eating your cookies (which incidentally she buys), not baking for you and leaving you occasionally would not make your case a priority, I'm afraid. Loved your post though.

    ReplyDelete
  6. LOL Rita, way to go!! I love the picture of you not looking at her. But I have to confess, I went looking for my doggie cook book for Tasty Tuesday and I couldn't even find it....at least your Momma knows where hers is.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ha ha ha - Jackie, I love your little footnotes explaining yourself. I'm tempted to go back and make my own explanations about how Felix is always underfoot and it's SAFER in the back seat, but I suspect that would only set Koly off on a rant. Thanks for joining in!

    ReplyDelete
  8. She eats your cookies?!? For real?! My Ma would never do that! BOL

    ReplyDelete
  9. Going out for the evening...without Rita....that is pretty unforgivable. Don't you know you are just supposed to stay home...always!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Stealing cookies and going out without you......scandalous. This really is a bad case of neglect and well in need of shaming. You can't get the staff these days. Have a wonderful Wednesday.
    Best wishes Molly

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hey Rita, maybe you should tell your mom that it's not weird that you are shy about pooping. I'm sure she doesn't like to poop where everyone can see her LOL. ;) Anyways, you are too funny - great human shaming today!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh boy, that is sure some shameful stuff! Hope you can get you mom under control, sounds to me like she may need some crate time and a short leash?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Okay Rita... I'd really, really, really like to side with you here, but....
    a) I'd eat your gingersnap cookies too... sorry, they're gingersnaps... yum!
    b) I've also never baked a single cookie for my dogs (THE SHAME!)
    c) I'm super jealous that your mom & dad went to a DM concert... I would've gone too...

    However, I don't blame you for trying to shame the woof out of her for doing (or not doing) these rotten things. I think it's about time to pull more of your middle-of-the-night mischief. Really get 'er good this time.

    ReplyDelete
  14. oh that is so funny! Your Mom is eating cookies that are meant for YOU!! BOL!

    ReplyDelete
  15. *gasp* How dare your Human eat cookies that are meant for YOU... AND not make anything out of the doggie cookbook. Talk about double whammy!

    ReplyDelete
  16. We knew you were not growling Rita. We think your mom is just trying to get back at you for shaming her...lol. But if you did growl because she was eating all of your cookies, we think that is justifiable. :)

    the brown dawgs

    ReplyDelete
  17. Ha ha! That's too funny. I never bake for my guys either. And I'd definitely steal a cookie or three from that tub. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Ha ha, Love it. Don't feel bad, I have never made cookies or anything for these guys either.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Our Mom has only made cookies for us once even though she and Dad are on a healthy cooking push.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I hope you feel better now, Rita. We are finally getting Trader Joes in this STATE and I will have to try the cookies myself, just to be sure they are OK. Turnabout is fair play. BTW I think you have a really cool mom and of course we love you lots!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hopefully soon you'll make cookies for Rita. Mom loves Depeche Mode too. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar

    ReplyDelete
  22. HAAAhahaha I am laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Haha those must be some darn good cookies. She should share better.

    ReplyDelete
  24. What? She eats your cookies, and then won't even bake you new ones to replace them? And then she's off having fun without you, instead of writing your blog? She just gave you way too much to work with there, Rita! :)

    ReplyDelete

We love comments - even just a smiley face or a LOL will make my day. (Yes, my days are pretty easily made.)

PLEASE NOTE: Comment moderation is turned on for posts over 2 weeks old, so if you comment on an older post and don't see it show up right away, that's why.